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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25540072">Jon Fucked Up They Are Stuck Now</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SD_oil/pseuds/SD_oil'>SD_oil</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Magnus Archives (Podcast)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Jon fucked up, M/M, Memory Loss, No beta we kayak like Tim, alternate ending to 159, atleast an open ending so far, open ending but not a happy one, spoilers up to mag 159, they are stuck in the lonely now</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 09:34:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,391</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25540072</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SD_oil/pseuds/SD_oil</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Martin. Martin, look at me. Look at me and tell me what you see.”</p><p>“I see…” There is a faint quaver in Martins voice before he continues “I see you, Jon...”<br/>“I see you.” Martin said with a small chuckle following suite</p><p>“Martin.” Jon  says in a relieved tone, while he grabs a hold of Martins hand.</p><p>“I… I was on my own. I was all on my own.” Martin says with a quiet sob causing his voice to break.</p><p>“Not anymore. Come on. Let’s go home.”</p><p>“How?”</p><p>“I… I don’t know” Jon says with a faint hint of hesitation, “I can’t see a way out”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>23</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Jon Fucked Up They Are Stuck Now</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This fic is dedicated to my friend Rory who you would better know as cherrysconesforsimon on here. Go check out their fic "Magnus Memorial" </p><p>This title was actually a placeholder title I just liked it so much I decided to use it for the real thing</p><p>This fic includes heavy mentions of memory loss, please take care if that is a subject you have problems with reading</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Martin. Martin, look at me. Look at me and tell me what you see.”</p><p>“I see…” There is a faint quaver in Martins voice before he continues “I see you, Jon...”</p><p>“I see you.” Martin said with a small chuckle following suite</p><p>“Martin.” Jon  says in a relieved tone, while he grabs a hold of Martins hand.</p><p>“I… I was on my own. I was all on my own.” Martin says with a quiet sob causing his voice to break.</p><p>“Not anymore. Come on. Let’s go home.”</p><p>“How?”</p><p>“I… I don’t know” Jon says with a faint hint of hesitation, “I can’t see a way out”</p><p>“What do you mean you don’t know?” Martins voice begins to raise in its tone. “I thought you Knew stuff now, can’t you just See a way out?”</p><p>“I… Martin I swear I’m trying to, there just doesn’t seem to be a way out anymore.” Jon’s voice trembles on the edge of helplessness. “Back when. when I first saw you, In the lonely I mean, I could see the way out. But somehow in the time in between something happened.”</p><p>“Jon, what. What- what did you do?” Martin says his voice turning frantic.</p><p>“I- I don’t – maybe, I think I killed Peter. Martin maybe that’s the reason we can’t leave. What if- What if he was the only way we could leave? I-”</p><p>“No, no that can’t be it! There must be another way Jon. Tell me there is another way!” Martin said frantically.</p><p> </p><p>**</p><p> </p><p>Jon knew this was going to happen, he should have held on to Martins hand so he had something to keep him grounded. Nevertheless here he was with martin partially see through walking behind him.</p><p>“Martin?”</p><p>“Hmm, yeah.” Martin reacted absentmindedly.</p><p>“Are you alright? You’ve turned a bit see through dear.” Jon said in a soft voice</p><p>“Oh, yeah looks like I did. Sorry”</p><p>“Don’t apologise, you can’t help it. Could you try to turn solid again? For me?” a small blush crept up on Jon’s face as he said, ”I would like to hold your hand”</p><p>“Oh,” slowly the colour came back to Martins face as he turned solid again. ”I-I could try”</p><p>“Thank you,” Jon said as he reached for Martins hand “I’m here, don’t forget that.” Jon said as he squeezed martins hand.</p><p> </p><p>**</p><p> </p><p>How long had they been walking? If you asked Martin he wouldn’t know. Every few minutes he seems to remember to blink his eyes and look around him, only for his eyes to be met by a very worried looking man with greying hair who he swore he had seen before but doesn’t know when or how.</p><p>Every few minutes Jon remembers to squeeze the hand of the man he loves so dearly to help Martin ground himself, only to be met by two hazy looking eyes slowly blinking at him trying to determine who this man holding his hand is.</p><p>They have been walking for what feels like days, but Jon Knows it has only been 18 hours and 28 minutes. They still haven’t found a way out and slowly but surely Jon is losing hope. He isn’t sure they will ever be able to leave. Jon Knows he would lose Martin to the lonely for good before he would find the exit for them.</p><p> </p><p>“Martin, are you here?” Jon asks while looking in the misty eyes of the auburn haired man.</p><p>Martin reacts in a low hum. “Martin try to say something to me, please,” Jon says a bit more firmly. “I want to hear your voice please.”</p><p>“Hmmm, what” the man slurred slowly, “what do you want me to say.” The man Jon knows as Martin says in a low whisper.</p><p>Jon sighs thankfully, “Just whatever you want, just… try to say stuff, try to stay with me.”</p><p>“Oh. Alright. Well I- I am Martin? I think” Martin says in a questioned tone.</p><p>“Yes,” Jon sighs thankfully. “Yes you are, you’re Martin”</p><p>“I- I am Martin, yes Martin. Quite a funny name honestly.” Martin says as his lips turn into a slight smile.</p><p>“Martin, can you try to remember me?” The grey streaked haired man asked Martin while looking into his eyes.</p><p>“I- I can try, I must know you, you look at me like you know me,” Martin says as the grey haired man holds his hands. “I- know you care about me, I don’t know how or why. But I know that.”</p><p>“Yes- yes Martin, I do. I- I care about you so much.” The man says as he squeezes Martins hands. “Do you want me to help you remember me?”</p><p>“If you could, I- I think I would appreciate that.” Martin says with a slight smile.</p><p>“Okay, I am going to start with telling you about me. If that doesn’t work I have a different idea but that one might not be as pleasant and you might not like it.”</p><p>“Tell- tell me about you.” Martin says while breathing out in a whisper.</p><p>“Ah, okay. Well I am Jon, well technically Jonathan,” Jon lets out a small chuckle. “I am, or was I don’t know yet. The head archivist of the magnus institute, London.”</p><p>“Hi Jon.” Martin says as he lets out a small chuckle as well.</p><p>“You, Martin, Were my assistant. Were, then you turned into peters right hand and got into this whole… state. You bring cups of tea when you need a distraction from your work. You love cows. You care so much, so much. You care, about me. At least I hope, I think you do. Or did.” </p><p>Martin squeezes Jon’s hand, “Please continue, I don’t remember yet. But I will I promise, I’ll try.”</p><p>“Okay then. You were vastly unqualified for your position, but you learned and kept on trying. You stopped studying at 17 to care for your mother. You had 3 underpaid jobs to have enough money to care for you and your mother. You actually lied on your CV to get your job at the magnus institute.”</p><p>“I- I did? I- I think I remember that!” Martin says in a relieved tone.</p><p>“Yes! You did. Can you try to remember what you put on your CV? For me?” Jon asks as he corrects his posture.</p><p>“I- didn’t I put. Correct me if I’m wrong, I don’t know for sure, But did I change my age? I believe I changed my age.” </p><p>“You, you did! Which at the moment was quite a relief! You also put down that you had a master’s degree in parapsychology. Which is quite impressive no one noticed you were lying about that.”</p><p>“I mean I was always great at lying to be fair. I think I remember more now. I still don’t know everything yet, but I am getting there Jon.” Martin says while looking down at the ground with a relieved smile on his face.</p><p>“Martin look into my eyes, please.” Jon says as he put his hand on martins cheek to guide his eyes into martins line of sight. “please tell me what you remember”</p><p>There are a few seconds of silence when all of a sudden,</p><p>“WAIT! Jon we are stuck! There is no after this, we are stuck and I will keep slipping until one time I won’t come back!” Martin shouts as he lets go of Jon’s hands. </p><p>“Welcome back Martin,” Jon says in  very relieved tone as he moves to hold Martin in his arms. “I thought I lost you for good this time.”</p><p>“Jon I, how- how often has this happened?”</p><p>“To be quite honest this was the fourth time, this time was the furthest I have ever lost you, I- I don’t want to lose you again Martin.”</p><p> </p><p>**</p><p> </p><p>“Shit shit shit shit shit.” Martin was gone before Jon noticed him blinking away. </p><p>Jon was now frantically looking around all while screaming “Martin! Martin! please where! where are you please! Come back! I-!” He collapsed on his knees before he could finish his sentence.</p><p>“fuck.”</p><p>After collecting himself Jon slowly got onto his feet.</p><p>“I won’t let you be gone again, I will search for you until I physically can’t anymore. Martin, just- wait for me.” he whispered to himself. While slowly walking away from the place he just collapsed to search for Martin, his Martin who was long gone.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading! please leave a comment and/or kudos and share what you liked or disliked about it!<br/>I am sorry for the fact that I am unable to write something that isn't angst.</p><p>This is my first fic that i have actually finished i hope you like or enjoyed it.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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